


Catharsis

by Tiptapricot



Category: Bill & Ted (Movies)
Genre: Captain Logan is a dick, Fluff, Hurt/comfort kind of?, Implied Child Abuse, M/M, Post FtM, Protective dad/husband Bill, bill is pissed, bnt are married, i just wanted someone to give cap Logan what he deserves, one use of the f slur, theres hugs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:36:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27804688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tiptapricot/pseuds/Tiptapricot
Summary: Bill does something he’s been wanting to do since middle school: punch Ted’s dad.
Relationships: Ted "Theodore" Logan/Bill S. Preston Esq.
Comments: 31
Kudos: 111





	Catharsis

It’s been almost two decades by the time Bill sees Captain Logan again. Two _glorious_ decades where he hasn’t once had to see Ted frown or cry or go all stiff because he’s been yelled at. Two decades where Bill hasn’t had that tense feeling in the back of his neck from clenching his jaw too hard.

He and Ted have grown up. They’ve gotten married, had kids, saved the universe, gotten divorced, gotten married again (to each other this time), and continued to pursue their music career surrounded by a loving community of family and friends.

But good things can’t last forever.

Bill’s out grocery shopping when it happens. It’s Ted’s turn to cook dinner that night and he’s asked Bill to pick up some things on his way home from the studio. He’s got his earbuds in, humming along to one of the recent chart hits that’s gotten stuck in his head again while he skims over a shelf of tomato sauces.

When someone taps on his shoulder, he glances back expecting to see someone needing to reach past him, or maybe even a fan, but instead Bill comes face to face with the familiar, hard, stare of one Johnathan Logan. 

He raises a brow, reaching up to slowly pull out his earbuds.

“John,” he says.

“Bill,” Captain Dickweed responds.

“What do you want, dude?” Bill asks, turning to face him fully.

“Why, I’m glad you asked,” Johnathan says, in a tone that indicates he’s anything but. “I want to see my granddaughters, Bill.”

Bill glares, frown deepening. _“No,”_ he says flatly.

There’s so much more he wants to say than ‘No.’ He wants to say, _You’re never going to meet them,_ say, _We won’t_ **_let_ ** _you meet them._ He wants to say, _You don’t deserve them,_ and, _You are a terrible, heinous, dickweed who made Ted’s life a living hell and so help me if we were not in the middle of a Safeway right now you’d be going home with a black eye._

But he doesn’t. Because they _are_ in the middle of a Safeway, and he doesn’t want to get security called on him for chewing out his husband’s dad in the middle of the condiment aisle. The people around them are already starting to give them weird looks, so Bill will be civil just this once. At least, civil enough to get back to the van without issue. 

“We’ve already had this conversation, dude,” he says, pinching the bridge of his nose in exasperation, “and the answer’s no different.”

Johnathan shakes his head. “I don’t think you understand the situation. They are my _granddaughters,_ Bill, and I am _entitled_ to meet them.”

Bill sighs, roughly grabbing a jar of marinara from the shelf and dropping it in his cart. “No you aren’t dude.” He pushes past him without another word, and thankfully, Johnathan doesn’t follow.

Bill picks up the last few things on Ted’s list and checks out, thinking that’s the end of it, but right as he’s rolling the cart through the automatic doors, a shout sounds out from behind him.

“Wait just a minute there!”

Bill groans and continues walking, the wheels of the cart rattling as he pushes it onto the asphalt.

“I said wait a minute, _Bill!”_ Johnathan jogs up next to him, groceries jostling in his basket, looking more pissed than before. Good.

“I want to see my granddaughters,” he repeats for what feels like the millionth time, “and it is my _right_ as their grandfather to do so.” 

Bill pointedly ignores him, eyes fixed ahead. It’s always the same with him, he never takes no for an answer. He’ll just keep nagging and nagging and _why_ did Bill have to park the van at the other end of the lot? 

When he doesn’t acknowledge Johnathan, the man walks a little faster. “You and Ted can’t just keep those girls cooped up at that house of yours, their mothers off on some goddamn soul searching journey, where their only role models are-are“ he stammers as he tries to find the right words, “are _failures_ and _queers_ who haven’t even had the decency to get real jobs!”

Bill comes to a sudden stop, taking a deep breath through his nose. Ok, nevermind. That’s it. He turns and fixes Johnathan with the sharpest glare he can muster, his lips pressed in a tight, angry, line.

“You. Will. _Never._ Meet. Them,” he says, hard and clear and simple. “Your grand _children_ are wonderful, fantastic, _excellent,_ kids, and they are loved and they are protected and you will _never,”_ he jabs a finger at Johnathan’s chest, “be a part of their lives because _you have not earned that right._ You have not _earned_ Thea’s smile when she hears an awesome new song, and you have not _earned_ Billie’s laughter when they tell an outstanding joke, and you have not. Earned. Them,” he says with one final, sharp, jab. 

Johnathan is left staring back at him, mouth a little agape in shock, and Bill turns back to continue pushing his cart before he has the chance to form a comeback. He’s still fuming, but he thinks he said enough.

And really, he did. That should be the end of it. Bill should be able to leave Johnathan behind in that parking lot and go home to his family like nothing happened.

But instead, because he’s Johnathan _fucking_ Logan and can’t seem to shut up, Bill hears him say, clear and cutting and nauseatingly, _intentionally,_ mocking, “So Billie’s a _they_ now? I’m not sure why I’m surprised, of _course_ you two were going to raise another faggot.”

And Bill sees _red._

He doesn’t take time to think, he doesn’t need it. He whips around in a split second, and the next, his fist is slamming into San Dimas Police Captain Johnathan Logan’s jaw.

***

It takes a sizable chunk of bail money and an odiously long call from the family lawyer Liz hired for Bill to be released from police custody. He knows Johnathan is doing everything in his power to try and keep him there, probably to charge him with something heinous too, but whatever the lawyer said worked, and that’s all that matters.

Honestly, Bill would’ve deemed the whole fiasco worth it if not for the look on Ted’s face when he comes into the lobby. 

He’s hunched over in one of the little seats crammed in the corner, all tense and anxious, his leg bouncing nervously beneath his elbows, and of a sudden Bill feels like a total dick.

Ted catches sight of him and is up in a second, rushing forward to engulf him in a hug.

“Hey dude,” Bill says, squeezing him back gently.

Ted pulls back immediately, holding his shoulders firm, eyes frustrated and wet with tears. He looks over Bill’s face for a moment before giving him a small shake. “Don’t _ever_ do something like that again,” he says, grip tightening.

Bill laughs softly, nodding. “Yeah, yeah, I know dude, I’m sorry.” He reaches up to cup Ted’s cheek in an apology, rubbing a thumb along his jaw. “I’m sorry,” he says again.

Ted leans into the touch, covering Bill’s hand with one of his own. His beard tickles against Bill’s palm. 

After a moment Ted takes a shaky breath and blows it out, nodding slightly to himself. “Yeah,” he mutters. “Ok.”

The drive home is quiet. Neither of them turn on the radio, letting the hum of Thea’s little compact fill the space instead. Streetlights cast shadows over the dash and highlight the tense planes of Ted’s face in red and green and white, and Bill wishes he could do something to smooth out the furrow in his brow.

Ted’s still angry at him, and Bill probably deserves that.

They pull into the driveway and the engine sputters off, leaving them in the dark. Leaving them with each other.

There’s silence, and then Bill says, “He was trying to get me to let him see the kids again, dude.”

He sees Ted’s silhouette nod in understanding.

The quiet stretches for a few seconds more. Bill swallows thickly, shifting to face Ted. “And he um…” he wets his lips. “He also called Billie a you-know-what when I used their pronouns.”

Ted blows out a harsh breath, slumping forward. “Oh _jeez,”_ he mutters against the steering wheel.

“I don’t feel bad, dude.”

“I know,” Ted murmurs.

“And I’d totally do it again.”

A breathy chuckle, and Bill can feel the tension dissipate. “Yeah, I know.” 

A hand bumps against Bill’s in the dark and he takes it, squeezing tight.

They sit there for a few more minutes, just because this time, Ted’s thumb occasionally brushing over Bill’s knuckles.

“Did it feel as good as we always thought it would dude?” Ted asks softly after a bit.

Bill’s face splits into a wide grin. “Totally amazing dude.”

That makes Ted laugh, which in turn makes Bill laugh, and before they know it they’re both leaning against each other for support as relief rolls through them in one big, bright, wave. 

They’re safe here, in this life, in this present, and nothing can touch them.

“Bill,” Ted says, head lolling against his curls when they’ve both finally calmed down enough to breathe, “I love you so much.”

Bill smiles, tilting his head up until he can feel Ted’s nose bump against his own. 

“As do I, my most excellent spouse,” he murmurs against his lips, before leaning in gently to prove that statement in full.

**Author's Note:**

> This was really just me projecting, because I too want to punch Jonathan Logan😌
> 
> I’m also on tumblr under the same username, so swing by if u want and tysm for reading!


End file.
